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The Eggplant


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Dear Arne. . . Next Phase of RTTT

Dear Arne,

Thanks for lunch. That sharkburger was A-One.

As usual, our working session was productive I always appreciate how receptive you are to my ideas. I just want to summarize what we agreed on for the next phase of Race to the Top rewards.

  • Reward districts that make part-time, on-call teachers.a staffing priority. As successful entrepreneurs know, the expense of fulltime workers, what with benefits and all, far exceeds their utility. With our partners at Pearson creating a full series of digital instructional resources, fulltime teachers become an anachronism.

  • Since research by the fellows we like indicates that reduced class size doesn't increase test scores, schools should invest in bunk desks. Double-decker desks double class size with a minor outlay of expense. Offer extra rewards to districts that try triple deckers.

  • Introduce books formerly housed in now-defunct libraries as a lunch menu item. We'll fund Fordham to do a study showing that consuming foods containing ground-up library books provides the fiber needed to help students' digestive processes. As always, Chicago will be a good place to introduce this innovation. The Foundation will give the PTA an extra grant to plug the benefits.

  • Our next lunch is on me.


    — Susan Ohanian
    The Eggplant



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