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NCLB Outrages

Yes, She Did It Again: Margaret Spellings Walked Into a Bar. . .


Here you can find Margaret Spellings' earlier bar adventures.



by Jim Kimbrough

Margaret Spellings walks into a bar and sits down next to an alligator.

The alligator eats her in several chewy gulps and a half hour later, is doubled over in severe pain.

The alligator looks at the bartender and says: " Man, I don't feel well, I don't know what's wrong".

The bartender replies: "I do, I do! It was that Barbituate!"



by Georgia Hedrick

MARGARET SPELLINGS walked into a bar. Unaware that she had slipped and fallen into a time warp, and was in a Bar with young master Will Shakespeare.

He turned to see her enter. âPrithee, wench, what do you here? Best thou mind thy own pâs and qâs as we will not!â smirked young Shakespeare, wont to set a table at a roar.

âYoung man, are those the only letters you know? There are 24 more, and these all have sounds to make so that you might one day read words with them. What lack of schooling you show!!!â gasped Margaret.
âP and Q are all the letters I need today, for who drinks ought but pints or quarts?â laughed young Will.

â Young man, you will never amount to anything,â retorted Margaret, spinning on her heel and out the doorâ¦lost in time and space, and totally unaware.

Young Will then thought to himself: âMethinks that shrew needs tamingâ¦ah, yes, âTo Tame a Shrewâ¦âbut right after I finish with my pâs and qâs. PINTS ALL AROUND!" Will shouted. "THE SHREW IS GONE!â
(And a play was born.)

— Jim Kimbrough and Georgia Hedrick
e-mail
2007-06-17


INDEX OF NCLB OUTRAGES


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